Shattered
by The Last Ronin
Summary: Emma thought she was ready to sacrifice anything to rescue her son but the price was far higher than she ever imagined and she is left a hollow shell of herself as a result. Withdrawn, depressed and teetering on the edge of insanity can she survive when she left part of herself in Neverland? Is it possible to live with a shattered soul?
1. Shattered

This is an idea I've been kicking around for a while though I'm not entierly sure where it's going. Be warned, this is gonna be a fairly angsty short story.

_**~The Last Ronin~**_

"Emma, honey, can you hear me? It's Mom…"

Those words break through the numb haze that has engulfed my mind and I turn my head slightly towards the sound. I open my mouth to reply but nothing comes out. A twinge rips through me, originating somewhere in my chest, but before I can grasp what it is, the numbness slams back over me, pulling me back into it's cold embrace. Safe.

I turn back to the wall, slowly tracing the stitching of each pad that lines it with my eyes. At first I tried counting them but I could never get passed one. One pad. One stitch. One thread. One soul…Maybe one more try though.

One. One. One. One…

**x-x-x-x-x**

"Why doesn't she answer?" Snow asks Dr. Hopper as she watches our daughter, her face twisted with worry, "And why is she wearing that…"

"Well, she's heavily sedated right now," the Doctor responds in his usual quiet voice, "and the jacket is for her safety as well as that of the staff. As I told you on the phone, Emma attacked one of the orderlies earlier…"

"My mom's gonna be ok though right?" Henry interrupts, clutching nervously at his grandmother's hand.

"I-I don't know Henry," Dr. Hopper replies after a moments hesitation, "something…broke inside your mother and until we know what it is and what caused it we can't really help her."

Snow sighs and turns to face the Doctor, the worry on her face turning to sadness, "Come now Dr. Hopper, you know what's wrong with her. She's been like this ever since Hook…"

"The pirate? Isn't he dead though."

"Exactly," Snow nods, "he died and my daughter's heart broke."


	2. Denial

Have to say I was quite shocked by the response to the prologue given how short it was. Thanks so much to everyone who reviewed! Two pieces of good news: This chapter is considerably longer than the last and I now have a good idea of where this is going. Enjoy!

_**~The Last Ronin~**_

"Emma! Look out!"

I'd barely begun to turn, to face the oncoming threat when his body crashed into me. Heat had flared through me at his closeness, the scent of leather and salt and rum – his scent – enveloping me and I'd instantly relaxed. When had that even started? At what point had Captain Hook become synonymous with my definition of safety?

I reached up to cup his cheek, trace the line of his jaw, revel in the feel of his stubble. He watched me with that same awe filled look that had become something of a permanent fixture on his face of late – the one that made me melt a little inside each time he sent it my way – and I couldn't stop myself.

Leaning in, I kissed him. He tasted like he smelled – leather and salt and rum and…copper?

The distinctive sound of flesh splitting apart filled my ears and he was torn from my grasp. All I could do was stare as he was dragged into the jungle.

Gone.

I hadn't even been able to scream.

**x-x-x-x-x**

I scream.

A pair of hands grab me by the shoulders and I thrash about, trying to shake them off. It doesn't work though and instead I try to push them away but my arms are pinned to my side. White hot panic burns through me and I scream once more as I try to throw off my attacker.

"Emma!" A voice fills my ears, chanting my name over and over.

Killian!

I relax instantly, his hands tightening on my shoulders as…wait, hands? With a shake of my head the worried face of Dr. Hopper fills my vision, two large men flanking him – one with a needle poised above me like a serpent ready to strike.

"Archie?" I ask, more than a little confused as I take in my surroundings: a small room devoid of furnishings save the bed I'm sitting on and a light somewhere over my head, "Where's Killian? And where am I?"

"Emma," Archie sighs and waves the two men back, "why don't you tell me what you remember."

"What's going on?" I ask instead – why does my voice sound so hoarse?

"You started screaming in your sleep," Archie steps back and pulls off his glasses to clean them.

One of the men returns – when did he leave? – and hands a chair to Archie which he accepts with a smile. Both the men nod once and leave the small room as the former conscience takes a seat in front of me.

"Now, why don't you tell me what you remember," he prompts once more and my eyes snap back to him.

With a sigh I stretch and run my hands through my hair before settling back on the bed – where am I?

"Neverland," I say – it's both an answer and a curse. Killian had said it was a horrible place and now, having been there, I agree wholeheartedly.

"What about Neverland?"

"We went there – Killian, Mary Margaret, David, Regina, Gold and myself – to rescue Henry," not that Gold had been much help considering he took off before we even got ashore. I'm not even sure if The Dark One made it back or not as he wasn't on the ship with us when we returned.

"Emma, what happened in Neverland?" Archie asks and jots down something in a notebook – did he have that before?

"Nothing too exciting. We fought The Lost Boys a few times, thought David had been poisoned by Dreamshade – though it was really just a bad cut that got infected -, spent what must have been weeks tromping around the island before finally catching up with and defeating Pan. Then we all came back except for Gold."

That's definitely the abridged version but it answers the question. Now the cricket better start talking himself.

"Everyone other than Gold came back?" Archie quirks an eyebrow at me, "Are you sure?"

"Of course I'm sure!" I snap, "Now are you going to tell me what's going on?"

I'm tired of this. I just want out of here – wherever here is – so I can go home and spend time with Killian and Henry. After so long away from my son I need to just hold him so that I know he's safe. And then there's my new – or rather, newly advanced – relationship with Killian. It's been years since I let anyone get so close and as much as I fought it – fought him – there's a growing part of me that's eager to remember what I've been missing.

"Emma…there's no good way to say this so I'm just going to say it," Archie hesitates, fidgeting in his chair and I narrow my eyes at him, "Hook didn't come back with you guys. According to everyone else, he was killed by Pan."

The breath catches in my throat and my eyes widen. What is he…? A vice squeezes my heart and for a moment I can't breathe but it passes quickly.

"That's not funny Archie," I snarl, "we all came back. Don't you dare joke about something like that!"

"Emma, I would never…"

"Don't lie to me!" I leap off the bed and advance on the man, "Where is Killian? I want to see him!"

"Emma, please, you have to understand," Archie jumps up and backs away, "he's…"

"Now!" I roar and grab him by the collar.

The door bursts open and I spin to face it, expecting to see my pirate waiting, arms open. It's not Killian though, but the two men from earlier. I let go of Archie to defend myself but they're huge – and surprisingly fast – and before I can so much as throw a punch one of them has me pinned against the wall.

A sharp prick stings my arm as the other man jabs me with a needle and ice begins to flood my veins.

I scream.

"Let me go! Killian! I want to see Killian!" I thrash around and continue screaming for my pirate but the injection has already taken hold of me and I'm quickly dragged down into oblivion.

**x-x-x-x-x**

"I thought you said she was doing well Archie? That video does not scream 'doing well' to me," I can't hide the pain in my voice – this is yet another bullet on the list of ways I've failed my daughter.

Besides me, Snow squeezes my hand and I pull her closer, offering what comfort I can. I know she feels the same. As much as we both love Emma, we've been horrible parents.

"She's grieving David," Archie says quietly, "from what you told me, Hook was killed right in front of her and whatever your own feelings for the man, your daughter obviously cared for him. Denial is just part of the healing process – I'd be more worried if she hadn't reacted as she did."

"But what can we do?" The way Snow's voice breaks on that question is like a dagger to my heart and I pull her against me tighter still as tears leak from both our eyes.

"Give her time," Archie says, after allowing us a moment to gather ourselves, "it's the only thing you can do."

Time. Why is that the answer to everything? How much more time must we give before our family is finally whole?


	3. Anger

Hopefully some of you have realized where I'm going with this by now. If not, pay attention to Archie and the chapter titles. Enjoy!

_**~The Last Ronin~**_

"Killian!"

"Emma no!" Neal grabbed me around the waist, hauling me back before I could charge into the jungle, "He's gone.'

"No!" I elbowed him in the gut, trying to break free.

"Emma stop!"

"Let me go!"

"No Emma!"

"Neal, if you don't let me go right now I'm going to kill you!" I snarled before something struck me from behind and blackness claimed my vision.

**x-x-x-x-x**

I pace the length of the room, my entire body vibrating with barely restrained energy. Once more I try the door but it's still locked. With a shriek I kick it again, a dull boom echoing through my prison the only effect of my outburst. Pulling back my fist I bury it in the padding on the wall but it's like hitting a marshmallow – useless.

Raking my hands through my hair – yanking more than a few strands out by the roots in the process – I scream at the top of my lungs.

"Archie let me the fuck out of here!" No one answers though and I attack the wall yet again. If I close my eyes I can pretend it's Neal's face that I'm beating black and blue.

The room is empty now, the bed I'd had before having been taken away. My lips twist up in a malicious grin as I remember how I lifted the frame and hurled it at Henry's father seconds after he walked through the door. The shock on his face was priceless, even as he dove out of the way.

The wooden frame had shattered and I would have been surprised had I not felt about ready to explode out of my own skin like Henry's favorite comic book character. For a moment I could have sworn my skin had even started turning green. That was probably just a trick of my red tinted vision though.

I saw red – mostly Neal's blood though some of mine was in there too. Red gushing from the hole in my former lover's shoulder where I'd driven one of the broken legs of the bed like a stake. Red pouring from my knuckles where the skin split when I hammered my fist into his face. Red from my lips after he backhanded me in return. Red. Red. Red.

A part of me was shocked – too small a part really, considering that Neal, for all his faults, had never struck me before. But the truth is I barely felt the blow; I still barely feel it.

I'm sure my face is a bruised mess right now but I can't bring myself to care. I'm just too…too…I scream and slam my fist into the wall once more, tears burning the backs of my eyes. Neal isn't the problem – not the real one anyway. The real problem is him!

He left! After everything that happened between us. After everything he did. Everything he said. Everything he made me feel…he left! That sonofabitch left me!

"'I quite fancy you from time to time.'" I snarl in a ridiculous impression of him, "Well guess what buddy? Right now the only thing I fancy is my foot buried up your lying ass!"

Once again I plant my fist into the wall, this time imagining that it's his face. We were supposed to all come back from that accursed island! He promised me! He promised we'd come back and start a life together!

Liar!

Liar!

That bloody fucking liar!

"Killian Jones!" I roar at the empty room, ignoring the throbbing ache in my most-likely-broken hand, "You better never come back because if you do I'm going to kill you! Do you hear me? You're dead Pirate! Dead!"

**x-x-x-x-x**

"Any change?" I ask Dr. Hopper as Snow and I enter the office he's borrowing from the hospital while keeping an eye on Emma.

"Nothing you probably want to see," Archie says quietly, turning away from the monitor that's displaying my daughter's room.

"We already saw Neal," Snow says, "what happened?"

Archie pulls off his glasses to clean them while watching us, "Anger; which is normal, though I'm a little concerned at the intensity of it – it's closer to rage really."

"But what happened?" Snow asks again.

"I thought maybe a familiar face would help her let out some of the feelings she's repressing – and it did – though it would have helped had I known more of Neal and Emma's interactions in Neverland beforehand," Archie sighs and replaces his glasses, "apparently he did something to her that made her angry while they were there and seeing him caused it to explode…violently as I'm sure you've realized."

"Will this last?" I ask, "I mean, is she going to stay like this forever?"

"She shouldn't, no, though I won't lie and say it isn't a possibility," Archie shakes his head, "the mind is a complex thing and every individual is different, but I believe Emma will get through this. Until this stage passes though we should keep her physically isolated. You can speak with her if you want but it should be done through the door."

"I would like that," Snow says immediately, "perhaps Henry would as well."

"It might help," Dr. Hopper nods, "just keep in mind that for the time being she's little more than a cornered and wounded animal…she may say and do things she probably won't mean."

"Alright then," Snow says and I can see her steeling herself for whatever we're about to face.

I take a deep breath myself. I've fought all sorts of creatures – wraiths and mermaids, sirens and dragons – all without batting an eye. But this, the mere thought of facing this demon wearing my daughter's face has ice running through my veins. How in the world are we going to do this?


	4. Bargaining

This chapter touches on a couple of subjects that may be a bit…disturbing (or insulting) to some people. Please bear in mind that at this point Emma is both heavily drugged as well as lost in grief and thus not entirely in her right mind.

You've been warned.

Enjoy!

_**~The Last Ronin~**_

"We should make it back to the Roger by tomorrow afternoon," Killian informed me as he slid his spyglass closed with the tip of his hook – a greatly practiced motion, I could tell and I found myself wondering how skillfully he might use the appendage for…other things.

"Hear that kiddo?" I asked Henry, "We'll be home soon. What's the first thing you want to do?"

He thought about that for a minute before his face lit up, "Dinner at Grannies with you and Dad and Grandma and Grandpa. Like a family."

I'd stiffened next to him, my eyes quickly finding Killian's. He was careful to keep his face impassive but I could see the worry on it just the same.

"Henry, we've been over this before," I'd sighed – I loved the kid's persistence but I wish he'd stop trying to press this particular topic, "your father and I are not getting back together."

"But he loves you," he'd argued, clearly unable to understand that his father having feelings for me wasn't enough to win me back.

"Maybe he does," I brushed the hair from his eyes and held them with my own, "but I don't love him."

"Well why not?" For a moment I'd been stunned – had he actually stamped his foot?

The surprise passed quickly though as my eyes returned to Killian's once more, "Because I'm in love with someone else."

**x-x-x-x-x**

"Killian…" I slur, my eyes intent on the blurry figure sitting before me as I press myself into the corner, trying to look as nonthreatening as possible. I don't know what they shot me up with after I nearly killed Neal – apparently a bed being thrown at him hadn't been hint enough so he'd snuck in to see me a second time. Regardless, I think me breaking his nose – and several fingers…and toes…quite possibly a few ribs as well – got the message across. I'd been pleased with my handiwork. The hospital was not.

Thus I was given some sort of sedative and I've been slipping in and out of consciousness ever since.

"Why did you leave?" I ask, fully aware that I'm whining, "I don't understand."

He doesn't answer, just sits there staring at me. I can hear the sound of him sharpening his hook though – as he always does when he's nervous or deep in thought – the comforting scrap of stone on metal reminding me that, at least for now, he's here. And if he's here, then maybe I can convince him to stay.

"Please stay," I start to reach for him but pull back, least I scare him away. I have to be careful. If I say the wrong thing he might…no. No, I can't think like that or I'll go crazy. I can convince him. I will convince him.

"What we…what we talked about the night that we…," I can't help how my face burns at that memory and it's completely irrational! It was just a kiss! But that's not true; it was so much more than _just_ a kiss. The truth is it was undeniable evidence that we were more than _just_ friends – had been for a long time if I'm being truly honest.

"Anyway," I shake myself out of my memories, "I want what we talked about…with you."

There. I said it. Still, though, he doesn't answer but continues sharpening his hook and now I'm the one who's nervous.

"Killian…Killian, please say something," I plead, "stay with me please. I'll do anything…marry you, have your children…anything! Just please stay with me!"

The scraping stops and I can see I finally have his attention. Yet he still remains silent and my nervousness flares up, full force. Why won't he say anything? Doesn't he believe me? Maybe…maybe words aren't enough.

Fine. I accept his challenge. It's been a long, long time since I've…but if this is the assurance he needs then I'm more than willing…not that I wasn't already. I had thought the circumstances of our first time together would be different, but I won't complain.

With shaking hands – honestly! I'm acting like a young virgin rather than a woman with a child – I stand and quickly divest myself of the plain white hospital gown I was given in place of my clothes. Resisting the urge to cover myself I reach for his belt.

"Emma!" His voice sounds strained and there's a clatter as he leaps back, knocking over his chair.

"Killian?" My voice cracks and despite myself I feel tears pricking the back of my eyes. Before I can say anything else he rushes from the room, the door slamming behind him, the lock clicking ominously.

I don't know how long I stand there, too stunned to move, before a sob bubbles from my throat. My entire body shakes as tears spill from my eyes and I sink to the ground, curling up in a ball to try and hold myself together. I feel as if a hole has been punched straight through my chest.

He doesn't want me.

I offered him everything and he doesn't want me.

The tears refuse to stop.

**x-x-x-x-x**

"Archie? Are you ok?" I ask as I simultaneously knock on the door and enter the office.

With a strangled cry of surprise he jumps, his hand darting out to turn off the monitor for Emma's room.

"David!" He gasps, "I'm sorry, you startled me."

"Is everything ok? You look a bit…feverish," the Doctor's face turns bright red and I lift my eyebrow questioningly. What the heck happened?

"I-I, no, I'm fine, really," he stammers, and pulls out a handkerchief to mop up the sweat beading on his forehead, "I was just talking to Emma a few minutes ago actually."

"Did something happen?" I can't hide the panic in m voice. If something happens to her…

"No, no, nothing like that," Archie says quickly, apparently noticing my tone, "She's just very out of it between what she's going through and the sedatives we have her on. She thought I was someone else and things got…awkward."

I let out the breath I hadn't realized I'd been holding and sigh. At least she's ok, "What happened?"

Dr. Hopper is silent for a moment, adjusting his glasses nervously, "I'm afraid I'm going to have to file that under the doctor-patient confidentiality clause. Just trust me, you don't want to know."

If he says so I'll believe him, though now I'm really curious, "but she's ok right?"

"All things considered," he reminds me and I sigh again.

"She's going to drive me to an early grave, isn't she?" I try to lighten the mood a little, in desperate need of an emotional pick-me-up.

"I'm told that's what daughters do to their fathers," Archie gives me a small smile and pats me on the shoulder.

I sigh yet again. It says a lot about the craziness that is my life when the most normal thing about it is the fact that my daughter will be the death of me.


	5. Depression

So we're getting close to the end here; 1-3 chapters left as of now and I'm about halfway finished with one of those chapters already. With any luck we'll be done by the time our favorite couple officially kiss for the first time!

Until then, enjoy my own version of that kiss.

_**~The Last Ronin~**_

How had it even happened? I'm still not sure to be honest.

There had been a fight - brutal and lightning fast - and somehow we had become separate from the others. Then it was over and we were still standing, still alive. I was coiled so tight, ready to spring into action again if needed, my entire body vibrating with unspent adrenaline and energy. He stood there, his posture saying he was still as wound up as I was.

His lips quirked up into that stupid grin of his that I'd come to look forward to seeing and despite myself I grinned back. A nervous giggle slipped from my lips and then we were both laughing like a couple of drunk fools - neither one of us having any idea what the joke was.

I acted before I had time to think - before I had time to be afraid. One second we were laughing, the next I was grabbing his jacket and yanking him closer, my lips crashing into his.

His good hand shot up, tangling in my hair, none-to-gently tugging my head to a better angle. At the same time his other arm wrapped around my waist, pulling me closer, crushing my body flush against his until I doubted anyone could tell where I ended and he began. A moment later my back was pressed against a tree and I couldn't have pulled away if I'd wanted to.

The world faded away as we devoured each other like we had been starving our entire lives - maybe we had. In the wake of the battle, the adrenaline still flooding our veins, it just suddenly felt so stupid - the way we'd been dancing around one another for months.

What was there to be afraid of? We made a hell of a good team. We understood each other in a way that no one else did - no one else could. We just...fit; like we had been made for one another despite the centuries that separated our births.

How was that even possible?

And, more importantly, why didn't that scare me?

**x-x-x-x-x**

I stare at the wall, not really seeing it, nor having any idea how long I've been looking at it.

"Emma, you need to eat something," Mary Margaret says quietly, nudging the tray with my...lunch?...towards me.

Slowly I turn to look at her before gravity drags my head down to glance at the food. A sandwich of some kind, a small salad, hot chocolate with whipped cream and cinnamon...green jello. A dull pang rips through my chest as I stare at the dessert, the memory of the first time my pirate saw the substance playing in my head.

I want to smile as I recall his reaction; the confusion, the irrational suspicion that someone was attempting to poison him - as if I would have let that happen. I know I should smile - because it's a good memory - just like I know I should eat. I just don't have the energy to do either of those things. I can't even remember what it's like to have the energy to do...anything.

So, I don't.

**x-x-x-x-x**

"Did you get her to eat anything?" I ask Snow as she comes into the office - though I'm fairly certain I already know the answer from the look on her face.

"No," she sighs with a shake of her head and I reach over to brush the tears from her eyes before pulling her into a hug, "she's already lost so much weight but she won't eat."

"Archie," I say over my wife's shoulder, "we have to do something. Emma's wasting away."

"I've already spoke to Dr. Whale about getting her setup on an IV drip and maybe a feeding tube, but he agrees that we have to proceed carefully," the Doctor answers, rubbing the bridge of his nose as he watches Emma's monitor out of the corner of his eye, "we obviously need to get some nutrition into her but we're loath to have her near anything she could hurt herself with."

Snow's head snaps up and she fixes Archie with a glare, "You think she's suicidal? My daughter is _not_ going to kill herself!"

I rub soothing circles into my wife's back, trying to calm her even as I grit my teeth. I don't like the implication that Emma might try to kill herself either.

"Please try to understand," Archie says, holding his hands up in supplication, "Emma is severely depressed - far beyond what is considered normal for her situation. I don't like thinking that she might try to take her own life either but we can't rule anything out either. Better safe than the alternative."

There's a knock on the door and Dr. Whale sticks his head in, "We're ready Dr. Hopper, if you still want to be there."

"Of course," Archie says quietly, standing before turning to us once more, "this is painful for me to say but you may want to start preparing for the worst. Emma is not going to like this and while it may improve her physical health, it's going to be a vicious blow to her mental health."

"What are you saying?" I whisper, tears blurring my vision as I cling to my wife and she to me.

"We can get her body healthy," Dr. Hopper says, "but unless she can find the will to live again, we won't be able to save her."

"Just tell us what you mean Archie," Snow manages around a sob after it becomes obvious I can't speak. I already know what he means...and so does Snow but we need to hear it.

Archie opens his mouth to clarify but no sound comes out and he turns away, tears of his own shining in his eyes. For the first time it occurs to me that maybe, just maybe, Emma's situation is a little over my friend's head.

Dr. Whale answers for him, his voice steady, emotionless - fully a Doctor who has had to deliver bad news before - as he conveys the facts, "As things stand now, Emma is going to die."


	6. Acceptance

And we're in the home stretch now! Only one more chapter to go after this one! Actually, I wrote the final chapter before I wrote this one before deciding that there needed to be something else in between the previous chapter and the last one. But, even though the last chapter is finished, I'm going to make you wait…because I'm mean like that. So I'll post it tomorrow.

As always, enjoy!

_**~The Last Ronin~**_

"What are we doing?" I groaned, burying my face into the crook of his neck, inhaling his wonderful scent.

"Right now? Hiding from your parents," he'd chuckled, his fingers teasing the hem of my shirt. He had been driving me crazy and I know the smug bastard knew that.

"You know that's not what I meant," I said with a snort and smacked him on the back of his head playfully, "I'm talking about this…us."

"There's an us?" He'd smirked though there had been a giddy smile in his eyes, "And here I thought you were just taking advantage of my being a gentleman."

"And what's that supposed to mean?" I'd shot back, giving him a dirty look.

"Simple love," the smirk didn't waiver for a second, "every gentleman knows that when a lady kisses you you shut up and kiss her back."

"Oh I see how it is. Well I'm sorry. I won't put you out like that again," it was my turn to smirk at him.

"And if I like being 'put out' as you put it?" His eyes bore into mine as he pulled me closer, letting me know what he wanted while still leaving the choice up to me.

As my lips captured his yet again, a single thought ran through my head over and over.

I was so screwed.

**x-x-x-x-x**

I'm back in my small padded room again after a stint in the ICU. At first they just had me hooked up to an IV…and strapped to the bed. After continuing to refuse food, however, I was graduated to a feeding tube. That had been the last straw that broke the grip of my depression. I was not a fucking invalid. I could bloody well feed myself.

Of course, by that point my inability to eat had weakened me enough that I couldn't really get much down, despite my renewed desire to do so. Thus it was a number of days before I actually could feed myself again and by that time I was angry enough to attack anyone who so much as looked at me wrong.

Where the Hell had Neal been then when he could have been useful? Goddamn asshole.

Now that I'm out of the ICU again and my anger has cooled considerably I don't know what to do with myself. I mean, I get that something has to change – I can't stay in here forever. I have to…move on with my life. But how? What do I have to look forward to anymore?

"He's dead," I say out loud, testing the words on my tongue. They're alien, foreign…wrong. And yet everyone says he's dead. I watched it happen. So why does it feel like a lie? Why don't I believe it?

Perhaps I'm just delusional. Heroes are supposed to get happy endings – live happily ever after and all that jazz. But…time and again I've come within reach of all that only to have it snatched away. If I'm a hero, a savior, then why can't I have a happily ever after? When can I stop fighting?

But…maybe that's the answer right there. It's so obvious, how had I ever missed it? I was a thief. I abandoned my own son. I got Graham killed for having the gall to have feelings for me. I fell in love with a pirate who had spent centuries plotting a single murder and had no doubt actually committed dozens – if not hundreds - of others. A hero doesn't do any of that.

I'm not a hero.

I'm the bad guy

I'm a villain.

And villains don't get happy endings.

Villains don't get to live happily ever after.

A knock on the door pulls me from my thoughts and I turn towards it as it opens and a woman slips inside.

"Mother Superior?" I ask, surprised to see her. I don't think she's ever sought me out before.

"Hello Emma," the older woman smiles, "I was hoping we could have a little chat."

**x-x-x-x-x**

"So why did you call Mother Superior?" I ask Archie, looking over at Snow to see if she has any idea but she just shrugs and shakes her head, apparently as in the dark as I am.

"Well it was her or Regina so I thought my old friend the better choice," Archie says, "but I thought it would be a good idea to have someone with a magical perspective take a look at Emma."

"You're suggesting we use magic on my daughter?" Snow says, "Magic has a price Archie, in case you've forgotten."

"I'm suggesting no such thing," Dr. Hopper assures her quickly, "I'm only suggesting that we've been looking at this from a scientific perspective up until now when maybe there's something going on that…"

"That science can't explain," Mother Superior finishes for him as she enters the office, closing the door behind her, "you're right. Science can't explain what's wrong with Emma."

"And magic can?" I ask, not sure I like where this is going.

"I didn't say that," Mother Superior replies, "but what I suspect is wrong is beyond either science or magic."

"Beyond…what else is there?" Snow asks and she sounds every bit as confused as I feel and Archie looks.

The former Blue Fairy shrugs, "Fate? Destiny? Providence? I don't actually know the name for it."

"Mother Superior, what are you saying? What's wrong with Emma?" Snow presses.

"Have you ever heard of Soul Mates?" The older woman asks and for a moment I think I heard her wrong.

"Soul Mates don't exist though," I feel stupid for even having to point this out.

"You believe in True Love but not Soul Mates?" Mother Superior shakes her head with a chuckle.

"What's the difference? I mean, I've always thought they were the same thing," Snow says, "and even so, how could having a Soul Mate be something bad?"

"They're completely different," Mother Superior snorts, "True Love is exactly what it sounds like, but Soul Mates are more of a…birth defect if you will. They're astronomically rare thankfully because they are literally a soul that has been split in two and born into two separate bodies."

"And…how is that bad?" I'm more than a little confused by all this…not that I really believe any of it.

"Soul Mates are unbreakably linked to one another, so if you kill one then the other dies as well."

Snow gasps but otherwise there's silence in the room and I suspect my wife has realized something that as of yet eludes me.

"Then that would mean…" Snow starts and Mother Superior nods.

"Yes. If I'm right about Emma and our apparently deceased pirate being Soul Mates - and I'm almost certain I am right - then it means that, somewhere out there, Killian Jones is still alive."


	7. Insanity

Here we are, at the end of this little tale. Thank you to everyone who has favorited/followed this – I was greatly surprised by the amount of people it drew in just a few short days. Special thanks to everyone who took the time to review. I always love hearing from readers and it made my day everytime you let me know what you thought about each chapter!

And, if you liked this story, check out it's companion "Somewhere Out There".

Thanks again and enjoy!

_**~The Last Ronin~**_

"What's the emergency Archie?" I ask as soon as I see the Doctor.

"Thank you for coming so quickly Sheriff, come with…"

"It's Deputy, Archie," I remind him for the hundredth or so time.

Dr. Hopper quirks an eyebrow at me but I ignore it. I don't want to argue with him right now. I just want to get this call over with, visit Emma and get home to my wife and grandson.

"It's been two years David. Don't you think it's time you made it official?" Archie asks.

"My daughter never gave up the position…" I start before he cuts me off.

"She can't do that, remember? And this town needs a Sheriff."

"I'm not arguing with you on this Archie – it's not my job to take and that's the end of it!" I snap, a little more forcefully than I'd intended.

The past several years since we returned from Neverland have not been easy ones for my family. Between filling in as Sheriff and visiting my daughter I've rarely been home for more than an hour or two at a time. Still, it hasn't been completely horrible considering Snow and I have more or less been joined at the hip when we aren't working; further united in our worry for our daughter. All things considered, it's the most uninterrupted time we've had together in years. Now if only our family were truly whole, everything would be perfect.

I tear myself from my thoughts as I remind myself that I'm here on business, "What was the emergency Archie? I want to get home sometime tonight."

"It's Emma," he jumps right in, "she's gone."

I curse.

So much for getting home tonight.

**x-x-x-x-x**

The wood creaks beneath my bare feet as I put my weight on it. As far as I know, no one has set foot on the Roger since we all got back from Neverland so logic says that it should be a mess. Yet the ship is steeped in magic so it looks exactly as I remember. It even smells the same – of him – and my head gets slightly fuzzy as his scent engulfs me. A single tear escapes my closed eyes but I hastily bat it away.

I can't believe I never thought to come back here until now. Then again, I haven't exactly had much choice in the matter considering I've been locked up for…I don't even know how long. My hand twitches down to trace a pattern onto my bare thigh, through the thin material of my hospital gown. It's my talisman, my reminder. Everyone says I'm crazy – and maybe I am – but I know.

I know.

He's alive.

He's alive and anyone who says otherwise can just go to Hell.

**x-x-x-x-x**

"How did she get out?" I ask as I examine the door to Emma's decidedly empty room. The door doesn't appear to have been forced and, at first glance, nothing appears to be amiss – not that there's much within the room to be amiss anyway. The only thing in the room is a thin mattress – not even covered with a sheet. The unfortunate truth is that we haven't been able to trust my daughter with objects of any kind – out of fear that she might hurt herself or someone else.

I wish I could say that that fear was unfounded, but shortly after we first admitted her to the hospital she sent Neal to the ICU. The rage she'd exhibited was like something out of…well, a fairytale. Not that it had lasted too long. Her mood has been as mercurial as the wind ever since Hook…

"My best guess would be magic," Archie supplies, "frankly I'm surprised we were able to keep her as long as we did."

"But why now? After all this time?" I wonder aloud, "What changed?"

"I would think it would be obvious," a familiar voice says and I turn to find Mother Superior standing in the doorway, "Emma finally became determined enough to leave."

"And why are you here?"

"Dr. Hopper called me, considering I was consulted on Emma's condition before," she says simply.

I snort, "and you really expected us to believe that _Captain Hook_ is my daughter's Soul Mate? Assuming such things exist – which you haven't convinced me they have – but, _Hook_? Really? And I suppose next you'll be telling me that Archie is really a leprechaun?"

"Don't be absurd," Mother Superior snorts, "everyone knows leprechauns don't exist. Soul Mates, however, are very real and based on the answers Emma gave me when I spoke with her, I strongly suspect that not only is your daughter one such individual, but that Killian Jones is her other half."

"As I recall, when you spoke with Emma she wasn't exactly right in the head," I shake my head, exasperated with the woman, "she spent half the time talking to a dead guy, when she was even able to speak at all."

"Well what did you expect David? How would you feel if everyone around you kept insisting that your wife was dead when you knew otherwise?" Mother Superior snaps and I'm momentarily shocked, having never seen her lose her temper before.

"I'd be going crazy," I admit.

"Good, at least you understand that much so now try to understand that if Killian and Emma are Soul Mates it would have been even worse for her because she would know with utter certainty that he was still alive. Maybe not consciously, but there would always be a nagging voice in the back of her head telling her he was alive despite what she herself saw and what everyone was telling her. I'd imagine that would drive anyone more than a little batty."

I grumble to myself, unable to deny that the woman makes sense. Really though, what bugs me about all this isn't the fact that she thinks _Hook_ is my daughter's Soul Mate, though that is an irritating thought, but rather that she isn't even one hundred percent sure that Soul Mates even exist. She's certain they do, but everything she knows about the subject is rumor and conjecture.

With a sigh I plop down on the mattress, trying to get into my daughter's head – an impossible task if ever there was one. If only I knew what she was thinking I could…wait a second. What was that noise? I shift a little to look around and again I hear the distinct sound of crinkling paper.

Looking down I press on the mattress, the same sound echoing in the room as I do. Without hesitation I unzip the mattress, turn it on its side and give it a shake. Hundreds upon hundreds of small papers pour out of the opening – mostly napkins I realize. The disturbing thing isn't the sheer number of them that Emma managed to hoard, but that they're all covered in the same symbol, drawn over and over again in what looks to be…blood.

"Still think I'm wrong?" Mother Superior asks as she examines one of the symbols: a very obvious merging of the capital letters K and E, "do I have to spell out where your daughter is?"

She doesn't and my hand drops to my side arm, reflexively checking that the well cleaned non-lethal weapon is still there as I head out. The tranquilizer gun gleams in the moonlight and I just hope I don't have to use it as I head for the Roger.

**x-x-x-x-x**

The sound of boots on the deck startles me awake from the light doze I'd fallen into and I grin like a lovestruck school girl at the thought of what that sound means. He's here. He's finally here, after so long.

I try to stay still so I can better listen to the footsteps slowly descend into the ship but despite my best effort I'm quite literally bouncing with excitement. Hurry up already before I lose my mind!

I wonder how he's going to react when he sees me? Will he cry with joy? Will he grin that grin I love so much? Will he sweep me into his arms and kiss me senseless? It's been so long and for a moment I wish I didn't look like the escaped mental patient that I technically am, though I suppose he won't mind – I'd been too eager to see him to bother trying to find anything else to wear.

Holding my breath I track the sound of his movements until he's right in front of the door to the cabin and I have to slap my hand over my mouth to keep from squealing like a little girl. He's here!

With a creak, the door swings open and I gaze upon the man who stands cloaked in shadows. A bit of metal at his side winks in the moonlight and I can just make out his lips twisting up into a smile as his eyes find mine.

"Emma."

Tears pour from my eyes and I can't do anything to stop them.


End file.
